Is it common for skating coaches to yell at their competitive students?

[Schmeck]

That's awesome though that she has your support, and is starting to stand up for herself.  So many kids just learn to look to mom and/or dad to fix things for them.  There are some pretty sad college stories out there, like the one where the parent followed her daughter to classes the first week, even sat in the classes to make sure they were 'right' for her daughter!

Since most skaters are not going to be Olympic material (we send 18 skaters maximum to Worlds each year) the skating experience is more of a life-lesson one.  You don't always win, you learn to share space and to look where you are going, you have to get along with all kinds of people.  You get 1 1/2 to 4+ minutes to show the judges what you are made of, and that's a great skill to have. 

[jumpingbeansmom]

That's awesome though that she has your support, and is starting to stand up for herself.  So many kids just learn to look to mom and/or dad to fix things for them.  There are some pretty sad college stories out there, like the one where the parent followed her daughter to classes the first week, even sat in the classes to make sure they were 'right' for her daughter!

Since most skaters are not going to be Olympic material (we send 18 skaters maximum to Worlds each year) the skating experience is more of a life-lesson one.  You don't always win, you learn to share space and to look where you are going, you have to get along with all kinds of people.  You get 1 1/2 to 4+ minutes to show the judges what you are made of, and that's a great skill to have. 

I agree, it is hard for some of them, but I make mine stand up for themselves, and ask their own questions too.

[isakswings]

That's awesome though that she has your support, and is starting to stand up for herself.  So many kids just learn to look to mom and/or dad to fix things for them.  There are some pretty sad college stories out there, like the one where the parent followed her daughter to classes the first week, even sat in the classes to make sure they were 'right' for her daughter!

Since most skaters are not going to be Olympic material (we send 18 skaters maximum to Worlds each year) the skating experience is more of a life-lesson one.  You don't always win, you learn to share space and to look where you are going, you have to get along with all kinds of people.  You get 1 1/2 to 4+ minutes to show the judges what you are made of, and that's a great skill to have. 

Oh dear... no. Following her to college is not what I would do. LOL! What I am talking about is completely different then that. I don't fix things for her at all and she very much understands how to win and how to lose. She's done it all. She definately has to make decisions for herself. In fact, I have asked that she and her coach discuss goals among themselves and decide what competitions and events she wants to do. of coarse, I have the final say, since I pay for a large percentage of her skating. The point is, I want dd to feel more in control of her skating. That is how it should be. I have to push this child to be more assertive. She has a difficult time asking the staff at the rink for help and she has been skating at this rink for years. I have to force her to do it.  it is our of her comfort zone. That said, her coach is not a push over. Her coach does get one her and does use descriptive words to help her understand what she looks like. She tells her when she is being sloppy and she tells her when she is doing it right! She just isn't over the top. Some kids do better with the over the top type coach, my child would melt into the side boards. I am not one to immediately pull my child from what looks to be an uncomfortale situation...unless I can clearly see she is distressed. In 3 years of coaching, my daughter has come off the ice in tears twice. Once because of something her coach said and another time because SHE was upset wtih herself. She tends to be harder on herself then her coach is.

Anyway, this is an interesting discussion!