You are viewing as a Guest.

Welcome to skatingforums - over 10 years of figure skating discussions for skaters, coaches, judges and parents!

Please register to be able to access all features of this message board.

Author Topic: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!  (Read 3133 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Newicemom2016

  • Designated Spinner
  • *
  • Joined: Oct 2016
  • Posts: 23
  • Total GOE: 0
Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« on: January 23, 2018, 01:40:07 PM »
As you I know I have not been around that long and still have lots to learn and figure out.  A group of coaches at our rink decided to team up and call themselves elite coaches, they almost created their own club within the club.  Is this normal?  My daughter only wants to skate with her 1 coach but somehow One does the schedule for all and share all their kids because they each have a specialty.  Yes I know they all have their own strengths, but personalities are all different.  How do I stop this without loosing the coach we like?  Also since this started they spend a lot of time talking to themselves instead of coaching, how do I bring that up without causing issues.  I really do not like conflict, should I just go to another rink and start over?

Offline nicklaszlo

  • Three-Penny Three-Turns
  • ****
  • Joined: Mar 2011
  • Posts: 1,281
  • Total GOE: 221
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2018, 05:07:13 PM »
The coach probably did this for financial reasons.  This scheme is designed to increase the number of lessons the "elite coaches" can sell.

Is this normal?

It is a pretty common way to coach.  Probably it is better for intermediate and advanced skaters.

How do I stop this without loosing the coach we like?

The coach you like has essentially quit already.  Ask the coach to switch back to the old system.  If they will not, then switch to a coach who will provide what you want.

I really do not like conflict, should I just go to another rink and start over?

No.  The coach is a professional.  Treat them like a professional.  If they do not respond professionally, all the more reason to stop working with them.  "Hiding" by switching to another rink suggests you did not maintain good relationships at your old rink.  All the coaches in your region will hear what happens; they all know each other.  Keep in mind that you may switch coaches again.  If you change rinks every time, you quickly run out of rinks near your home.

Offline Newicemom2016

  • Designated Spinner
  • *
  • Joined: Oct 2016
  • Posts: 23
  • Total GOE: 0
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2018, 05:38:12 PM »
Thank you everyone.  I thought my daughter did not like change.  So I tried to encourage the change as I could see what having the other coaches could offer.  From 1 coach to 3-4 Is a huge change, and she started to not want to go, when before it was her favorite part of the day.  That’s when I noticed it was more than just not wanting change.  Also of course that comes with more cost that they never discussed.  Anyways at her level and age I think the multiple people’s opinion is doing much more harm than good.  I just talked with him and he said it was no problem.  We will see how it will go from here.  It feels very awkward.  But I guess I just have to get used to it.  I still hope they stop talking to each other as much as they have been, because my 9y old even noticed and asked me if I had noticed.  Thank you again,  your answers helped me just go and approach him.  For the well over $1000 a month skating costs for my beginner skater she needs to be happy and that’s all I worry about. 

Offline tstop4me

  • Alex, I'd like to buy an axel…
  • *****
  • Joined: Oct 2015
  • Location: USA
  • Posts: 1,572
  • Total GOE: 196
  • Conserve Angular Momentum
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2018, 05:52:39 PM »
Thank you everyone.  I thought my daughter did not like change.  So I tried to encourage the change as I could see what having the other coaches could offer.  From 1 coach to 3-4 Is a huge change, and she started to not want to go, when before it was her favorite part of the day.  That’s when I noticed it was more than just not wanting change.  Also of course that comes with more cost that they never discussed.  Anyways at her level and age I think the multiple people’s opinion is doing much more harm than good.  I just talked with him and he said it was no problem. We will see how it will go from here.  It feels very awkward.  But I guess I just have to get used to it.  I still hope they stop talking to each other as much as they have been, because my 9y old even noticed and asked me if I had noticed.  Thank you again,  your answers helped me just go and approach him.  For the well over $1000 a month skating costs for my beginner skater she needs to be happy and that’s all I worry about.
Could you clarify?  By "no problem", do you mean that your daughter will get lessons from just a single coach again?  The rest of your response doesn't sound like this is the resolution.  Also, are they spending a lot of time chatting during the lesson time that you're paying for?

Offline icedancer

  • Custom Skates
  • *****
  • Joined: Aug 2010
  • Location: USA West Coast, Left Coast
  • Posts: 1,820
  • Total GOE: 143
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #4 on: January 23, 2018, 06:00:06 PM »
I have seen this happen - it may be more the "norm" not than it used to be but it seems like a way for the coaches to make more money!

I don't know what level your daughter is but if she is a beginner skater she doesn't need any "specialists" - I have seen little kids - 5 years old go from one 1/2 lesson to another 1/2 lesson to another all in one session!  There was not any practice time!  I have not seen any of these particular skaters go any further than skaters who basically are with one coach for 1-2 lessons/week.

At some point she may ask for lessons from another coach and there may be a way that those two coaches should work together and that may be great for her! 

And them spending all of that time talking with each other?  If it's not that they are "team-teaching" your skater I would say that is very unprofessional behavior and should be discouraged!


Offline Newicemom2016

  • Designated Spinner
  • *
  • Joined: Oct 2016
  • Posts: 23
  • Total GOE: 0
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #5 on: January 23, 2018, 06:31:58 PM »
Yes we are going back to just the one coach.  He said when we need more help we can revisit the subject.  Yes they are just talking and not coaching very annoying.  She is working on her axel and just finished pre mif test.  I think she learned a lot in less than 2 years.  But after the team approach I think she has unlearned things.  Club people are very upset over this whole thing.  They think it’s hurting and dividing the kids more.  That’s why I was cConsidering going somewhere else but from what you guys are saying, it sounds like this could most likely happen again.  Too much drama for such a expensive hobby. 

Offline icedancer

  • Custom Skates
  • *****
  • Joined: Aug 2010
  • Location: USA West Coast, Left Coast
  • Posts: 1,820
  • Total GOE: 143
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #6 on: January 23, 2018, 06:41:26 PM »
That sounds like a good plan.

If enough parents are upset about it they may revisit this idea if enough parents and skaters decide they don't like it - especially if there are other places to skate in the area they may want to hold onto their students.

It is true that you are hiring them - sometimes coaches seem to get the idea that they are completely in charge and they forget who is doing the hiring until the skater goes elsewhere.

I hope your skater starts having fun again!

Offline Newicemom2016

  • Designated Spinner
  • *
  • Joined: Oct 2016
  • Posts: 23
  • Total GOE: 0
Re: Coaches team up and daughter hates it!
« Reply #7 on: January 23, 2018, 06:48:03 PM »
Me too.  Because we have tried every sport and this one she kept wanting to go to until this happened.  She even asks for me to take her on her days she is off from school.  What you said is what really bothers me, we hire them.   I am very easy-going and I don’t question anything that is going on, Because I always see progress every time she goes, until I have a crying little girl that does not want to get on the ice.   I hope that this will stick and that he will not change his mind after words .  He has taught her everything she knows and she adores him.