Hi Hedwig, we're neighbours of a sort (I'm in France). And it's true that skating over here is much less popular, and managed differently from what I experienced during my youth in the US. Here, I am lucky enough to have a rink (that closes only 3 months in the summer) and a dance club (my background is free). The club does everything by group lessons more or less. The elite kids and those of us that are outside the norm in terms of levels get private lessons, but it's not a scheduled thing (for the adults). For me, as a relatively high level adult, I get help when one of the coaches more or less feels like it. The lower level adults are in group and always get attention. Sometimes they do skills with all of us, but it's totally random. We've had some coaching changes over the past year that have made it worse for the adults, alas, given the reputation of our new head coach, it doesn't look like that will change. One of the coaches is invested in the adults and is awesome, the other couldn't care less (and it shows). The awesome coach's time is therefore spread very thin as far as we're concerned, but we make the best of it.
I tell you all this to show that you are not alone (and maybe vent a bit
. Do what you can with the groups you have access too, and you will find friends. I recently had one of the other advanced adults video me for the first time. It was very very helpful, and I plan to make a habit of getting her to do that (and repaying her in kind, if she wishes). Hopefully, as you get to know more skaters in your community you'll be able to do similar things. The icoach skating videos are helpful, but to a degree. They're designed for other coaches, thus tell how to coach, if you don't have someone watching you and evaluating your technique, those videos risk being less effective than you might hope. But people here have gotten great feedback by posting their videos in the video vault on this site. You're doing the best you can given your resources, and I''m sure you'll continue to do so. The bottom line is to have fun and fulfill the love/need to skate. As long as you're doing that, its all good! Good luck!!!!!!