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On the Ice => The Pro Shop => Topic started by: blue111moon on September 20, 2011, 11:12:14 AM

Title: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: blue111moon on September 20, 2011, 11:12:14 AM
There's one boy in my LTS class (age 6 - Basic 2) who wears his sister's outgrown white figure skates.  He's very enthusiastic about skating and doesn't seem to know or care what kind of skates he's wearing as long as he gets to skate.  I think this is great and I don't want to discourage him in any way.

However, a new session will be starting soon and traditionally this is when the budding hockey players show up in droves.  I'm afraid that one of them (or one of their dads) will say something to the little boy along the lines of "Why are you wearing GIRLS' skates?).  In fact, knowing the crowd that we usually get, I'm pretty sure someone will say something eventually and it probably won't be kind.

I'm wondering if I should say something to the boy's mother about possbily painting the skates black.  I get the feeling that money is an issue;  the boy's older sister also skates with us and is progressing quickly.  I suspect that if new skates are needed, Sis will get them and Brother will again get her old white ones.

We're only talking Basic Skills here so I don't want to pressure the mom to buy into stereotypes but OTOH I don't want the kid subjected to any form of teasing or ridicule from the occassionally loud-mouthed hockey kids either.  The boy loves to skates, likes spinning and is looking forward to learning the jumps he sees his sister trying. 

Should I say something (heck, I'd even offer to paint the skates myself!) or keep my mouth shut and hope for the best?
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Skittl1321 on September 20, 2011, 11:19:18 AM
I'm not a parent, but I coach LTS.

At our rink, we have lots of boys in white skates in the early levels, and a few in freestyle also (and girls in black- great used skate trade).  Since it is common, it isn't an issue.

You know your rink culture, and if you think it will be an issue, I'd say something.  Could YOU spring the $8 for boot covers and give them to her? Ask for them to be returned when he grows out of the skates or quit skating (may not happen, so be prepared) and then you have a pair if the situation comes up again.  We have quite a few kids who use covers to camoflauge that their skates are the wrong color, or that they are down right OLD and ugly looking.

Or recommend skate tape or boot polish.   

A good way to prevent bullying is to let them know something might come up.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on September 20, 2011, 11:33:22 AM
There are a lot of parents who are really into gender-indifference, so unless you know that this is simply a hand-me-down situation, be careful how you approach the parents.  You don't want to offend or (maybe worse) get a lecture on why it shouldn't matter whether the kid plays with Barbie or GI Joe.  (just kidding...sort of...)

I had one absolutely adorable little boy in Parent & Me who wore white skates very proudly.  He won them in a raffle - his first time ever winning anything!  His parents didn't make a big deal out of the color, so neither did I.  I think that, given his self-confidence, he would tell someone who teased him, "They're my own skates, that I won all by myself!"  (They were a tad big for him, too, but he was determined to wear them because they were his.)

If your student is doing okay on these skates, you could share that with the mom.  Something like "He's doing really well on those skates- you were smart to reuse them."  Suggest changing the laces since they might be a bit stretched out or worn.  If she brings up the color, then you could offer suggestions on turning them black.  (I think a checkerboard pattern would be cooler, though, lol.)  If she doesn't mention it, I'd be color-blind.  After all, it really doesn't matter as long as he can use them.

We don't have any other boys at our rink wearing white skates, afaik. 
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Skittl1321 on September 20, 2011, 12:22:35 PM
Quote
There are a lot of parents who are really into gender-indifference, so unless you know that this is simply a hand-me-down situation, be careful how you approach the parents.  You don't want to offend or (maybe worse) get a lecture on why it shouldn't matter whether the kid plays with Barbie or GI Joe.  (just kidding...sort of...)

This is why it SHOULD NOT be approached to the kid.  But I think it would be worth the lecture to bring it up.  I like your idea of pointing out it is smart to reuse the skates, and would add "it shouldn't matter, but kids can be cruel".

Then the parents have the information to make the decision they choose.  I wouldn't bring it up again if they don't turn black.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: nicklaszlo on September 20, 2011, 12:59:50 PM
Or recommend skate tape or boot polish.   

Black electrical tape from the hardware store is really cheap.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: rosereedy on September 20, 2011, 05:42:15 PM
We have some LTS girls at our rink and one wears a pair of black boys skates.  She doesn't notice but I've seen coaches and other skaters laughing behind their backs about it. 
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Skittl1321 on September 20, 2011, 05:59:49 PM
I've seen coaches  

That is HORRIBLE. 
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: hopskipjump on September 20, 2011, 06:07:35 PM
No one would care at my rink - black on girls, white on boys.  Heck - I think everyone is just happy to see kids in their own skates vs rentals.  Rentals make skating difficult to learn to do more than go in circles around the rink.  If I were to see a coach mocking a CHILD, I'd say something to them right then and there. 
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: PrettySk8Dress on September 20, 2011, 10:36:50 PM
We have some LTS girls at our rink and one wears a pair of black boys skates.  She doesn't notice but I've seen coaches and other skaters laughing behind their backs about it.  

So, does the burden of adjustment fall upon the little girl skater in black boots, or the little boy skater in white boots, to conform to what others have determined is the preferred gender indication as evidenced by the color of their skates, or does the burden of adjustment fall upon the other skaters, coaches, and adults to dispense with possible prejudicial attitudes regarding alleged gender non-conformity, as evidenced by the color of the kids skates ? This can be a positive teaching and learning experience for all about gender issues, if done correctly, but a real clash and a messy display of attitudes by the adults if handled incorrectly.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on September 20, 2011, 10:51:01 PM
Yep, that's the lecture I meant. 
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Clarice on September 20, 2011, 11:08:57 PM
Didn't Michael Weiss start in white skates, handed down from his sister?
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on September 20, 2011, 11:24:56 PM
I think I remember that anecdote about Michael Weiss, too.

I had a student in a big group class for a private academy school that left me pronoun-challenged.  I had to use the child's name instead of him/her/he/she because I just could NOT figure out the 8-year old's gender.  Both ears were pierced with good-sized diamond studs, hair was shoulder-length and loose, the school wore uniforms, everyone had blue rental figure skates, no voice clues at that age and the name could be male or female.  I tried checking out who the kid hung out with, figuring birds of a feather - nah.  Got along with everyone, hung out with whoever was having fun.  Since I was teaching, I couldn't eavesdrop on others' conversations, to hopefully catch a him or a her, lol.  Towards the end of the class, I asked one of the teachers because I just couldn't stand the suspense anymore.  (The student was a boy, as it turned out.)
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Sk8tmum on September 21, 2011, 09:55:54 AM
My son wore white skates, with black boot covers. It worked.  And I have also seen little girls in black skates with white boot covers.  In terms of issues with equipment ... it does vary from community to community.  Where we live now, he would have been the object of ridicule from parents and skaters if he skated in white boots, thus, we would not want a then 6 year old boy to deal with it.  Where we lived back-in-the-day, the ridicule would have been NOT because of the colour of the skates, but, on a different level, that we couldn't afford to purchase him appropriate equipment, let alone the colour - ! 

Kids should never be teased or ridiculed when they are little. Skating is supposed to be fun ... end of discussion. But, I've also seen teasing in other sports where kids don' thave the "right" equipment, whether in terms of type, quality or "newness ..." 

Rant done.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Skittl1321 on September 21, 2011, 10:14:12 AM

When I was a kid and used to get left at the mall for hours to skate, I bought a pair of boot covers to put over rental skates.  Then none of the "regulars" wouldn't know I wasn't a "real" skater.  (Um, they likely could tell based on the fact that I was only there a few days a month, didn't take lessons, and couldn't do anything, but I didn't think about that then.)

I've seen a few kids in the high level LTS classes (B7/8, FS1) do the same- if they are still in rental skates, they cover them.  Around here, we are a winter state so most people own a pair of figure skates, and kids get them pretty early on.  But in other places I've lived, owning figure skates was a luxury for only the "best" skaters.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: PrettySk8Dress on September 21, 2011, 12:10:01 PM
My son wore white skates, with black boot covers. It worked.  And I have also seen little girls in black skates with white boot covers.  In terms of issues with equipment ... it does vary from community to community.

Kids should never be teased or ridiculed when they are little. Skating is supposed to be fun ... end of discussion. But, I've also seen teasing in other sports where kids don' thave the "right" equipment, whether in terms of type, quality or "newness ..."  

Rant done


This is the correct answer to my earlier question, IMO, and I agree with you that the burden should not fall on children to already know to " conform " to other adult's predetermined, judgmental attitudes. It is the adults who need to readjust their possible prejudicial attitudes about the appearance of possible gender non-conformity.
I feel that the gender designation as determined by the color of a skater's boots is a valid one. However, there should be an attitude of tolerance and acceptance for those skaters who may be the exception to the boot color indicator of gender. Examples of this would be child skaters who wear a different color of boots than their birth gender due to financial constraints, or due to fit and growth issues. Also teen and adolescent skaters who are or may be transgender individuals and undergoing gender therapy and social readjustment should be allowed to wear the color of boots of their correct gender. Transgender skaters also should be allowed to wear the appropriate skating outfits and clothing of their correct gender, too.  None of these young skaters should be
" teased or ridiculed " by other skaters or adults because of their situation being viewed as supposedly non-conforming, IMO. Especially adult skaters and coaches should take the lead in making the rink or practice sessions a place of welcome and tolerance to all skaters, within reason, the color of their boots or their choice of their correct skating attire notwithstanding.  
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on September 21, 2011, 12:19:46 PM
Oh yeah, lots of transgendered six-year olds running around.   88) 

The parents bought WHITE skates for their daughter and then passed them on to the son.  Since they didn't buy her black skates, so they probably are conformists and that's THEIR choice, which should be respected as well.  I think they're just trying to reuse the skates, not change the world.

The OP just wanted to give the parents some options to avoid teasing or bullying, which might discourage the boy from skating.  That's really what's most important.  You can't lecture other people or their children at an ice rink.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: PrettySk8Dress on September 21, 2011, 12:22:46 PM
Oh yeah, lots of transgenders six-year olds running around.   88)





Are " teen and adolescent skaters " really six years old ?
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Skittl1321 on September 21, 2011, 12:25:18 PM
Oh yeah, lots of transgenders six-year olds running around.   88)


You'd be surprised...
We had a 3rd grader (which I know is older than 6) who came to school everyday, but PE days (pants were required, even for girls), in a dress.  He had pierced ears (which he would wear "girly" earrings like dangles) and regularly wore makeup and nail polish. The school has a zero tolerance policy for bullying, so not much was said to him.  Outside of school, kids were horrible to him.  (This kid was not a figure skater.)  I don't know what happened to this kid, as this was 8 years ago, but I would not be surprised if he was truly transgendered, he definetly had the thought that he was in the wrong body for him.

At the rink we have a 5th grade boy who wears eyeliner everyday, to school as well- due to his hero, a singer from Green Day who also wears it. He also has a penchant for sequins and shiny clothes, and often comes to public skate in some wild outfits (that wouldn't be out of place in an international competition, but aren't typical for boys at his level, and definetly not on practice ice).  He was tease terribly in LTS (NOT while on the ice, we wouldn't allow it), but has been accepted in FS levels and has lots of friends at the rink.   I don't think this boy is transgendered.  I don't know whether or not he is gay, and it doesn't really matter- he hasn't even hit puberty really, so who knows if he even knows or has thought about it yet.



------------------

I agree that no one SHOULD get teased for non-conforming actions.  But they will be.  And unlike in a school environment, there is very little LTS instructors can do to prevent the behavior (since much of it takes place off ice).  For the case of the OP, I'd just let the parents know it might become an issue, with hockey kids returning to the ice soon.  The parents can then decide if action needs to be taken or not.   But to just say "they shouldn't be teased for it" and dismiss it as if it is no longer an issue is naive.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on September 21, 2011, 12:27:47 PM
Quote from: Skittl1321
But to just say "they shouldn't be teased for it" and dismiss it as if it is no longer an issue is naive.
Very good point.  We can't control what other people say or do, but we can either head it off or control how we react.  The OP wanted to know if she should clue the parents in to a potential teasing situation, which can be avoided with a little effort.  Or, they can give the kid good reasons why they're reusing the skates and work on some replies or tactics to use if they are bullied.  Either way, it's far more progressive than giving lectures without knowing the whole story.

Are " teen and adolescent skaters " really six years old ?

The OP said the boy in question is six years old.  He probably didn't ask for white skates, they're hand-me-downs from his sister. 


I wonder if the parents will buy the kid his own black skates before the OP gets a chance to chat with them, thereby negating all of our worries?  *chuckles*
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: PrettySk8Dress on September 21, 2011, 01:48:18 PM
We can't control what other people say or do, but we can either head it off or control how we react.  The OP wanted to know if she should clue the parents in to a potential teasing situation, which can be avoided with a little effort.  Or, they can give the kid good reasons why they're reusing the skates and work on some replies or tactics to use if they are bullied.  Either way, it's far more progressive than giving lectures without knowing the whole story.



Very good reasoning, FigureSpins, I concur.  So often, events such as the OP has pointed out, could be sessions of teaching and learning about tolerance and acceptance of different-minded children or skaters. But, unfortunately due to Human Nature, more likely the situation will degenerate into a " I'm Right, your wrong " or " I don't tolerate this, so you can't either " clash between the adults who, most likely, are not skaters or coaches.  I would hope that someone would step in as a Peacemaker and good example of repelling and defusing bullying, as I would do if this happened at my rink or skating club.

BTW---My reference to Transgender skaters was to " teen-aged skaters " , not to the OP's six year old. Typical six year old kids and skaters do not have gender issues, but a few teen-aged adolescents and skaters do begin to question their gender, and/or have gender issues when they reach the teen years. I know it can be just one more problem for coaches, adult skaters, teachers, club and rink officials, and parents to have to deal with.  
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Schmeck on September 21, 2011, 03:29:54 PM
You can't lecture other people or their children at an ice rink.

I believe that if parents/kids/coaches belittle and bully a child because his skates are the 'wrong' color, then yes, I can lecture them at an ice rink.  If they do it in public, they get called on it in public.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on September 21, 2011, 03:42:25 PM
I don't agree.  If you're an instructor, you can try to distract the kids, but lecturing is over-the-top. 

If a young child asks why the boy was wearing white skates, that's not bullying.
If there's constant teasing, it's better to break it up and talk to the parents.
If the confrontation gets physical, break it up and haul both of them to their parents.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: sarahspins on September 21, 2011, 04:24:43 PM
I'm really of mixed minds on this... while I personally "prefer" the traditional gender-specific black and white skates, I'm not bothered by anyone who chooses to skate in something else.  In fact I am in a position right now where my 4 year old is probably going to get white skates because he needs a wide width and those just don't come in low level boy's skates (I think the lowest model Riedell makes for boys that comes in wide is the 255 TS, which is well above what he needs.. it's similar with Jackson, boys just don't come in wide until higher levels).  I don't think I am going to bother taping his next skates or doing anything else to them... I will just leave them white.  He is only 4 and I can't see that it matters at all what color they are.. what matters more is that they will correctly fit his feet (he currently skates in tiny SP Teri's that we got for only $25... there's no way I am buying another pair in a size larger, they would be over $400!).
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Sk8tmum on September 21, 2011, 04:39:58 PM
I'm really of mixed minds on this... while I personally "prefer" the traditional gender-specific black and white skates, I'm not bothered by anyone who chooses to skate in something else.  In fact I am in a position right now where my 4 year old is probably going to get white skates because he needs a wide width and those just don't come in low level boy's skates (I think the lowest model Riedell makes for boys that comes in wide is the 255 TS, which is well above what he needs.. it's similar with Jackson, boys just don't come in wide until higher levels).  I don't think I am going to bother taping his next skates or doing anything else to them... I will just leave them white.  He is only 4 and I can't see that it matters at all what color they are.. what matters more is that they will correctly fit his feet (he currently skates in tiny SP Teri's that we got for only $25... there's no way I am buying another pair in a size larger, they would be over $400!).

You can get black boot covers for next to nothing, and that way the resale value is not reduced (as it would be by taping or painting). Or, if it's for a 4 year old - go really funky and get red ones or green ones !  My son would have loved it at that age (and so would my daughter, come to think of it ... she thought white was booorrringgg.)
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Schmeck on September 21, 2011, 07:20:37 PM
I don't agree.  If you're an instructor, you can try to distract the kids, but lecturing is over-the-top. 

If a young child asks why the boy was wearing white skates, that's not bullying.
If there's constant teasing, it's better to break it up and talk to the parents.
If the confrontation gets physical, break it up and haul both of them to their parents.

I'm not an instructor, but I do have extensive training in anti-bullying programs.  I do think we have different ideas of what constitutes lecturing  :)  I think telling a child that it is not kind to make fun of anyone, for any reason, and that I do not allow it to happen when I know about it is lecturing, and I will do that.  I won't spend half an hour talking about it, but I will address it as it happens, and I will not tolerate any kind of belittling behavior. 
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: AgnesNitt on September 21, 2011, 07:53:03 PM
There's one boy in my LTS class (age 6 - Basic 2) who wears his sister's outgrown white figure skates.  He's very enthusiastic about skating and doesn't seem to know or care what kind of skates he's wearing as long as he gets to skate.  I think this is great and I don't want to discourage him in any way.

However, a new session will be starting soon and traditionally this is when the budding hockey players show up in droves.  I'm afraid that one of them (or one of their dads) will say something to the little boy along the lines of "Why are you wearing GIRLS' skates?).  In fact, knowing the crowd that we usually get, I'm pretty sure someone will say something eventually and it probably won't be kind.

I'm wondering if I should say something to the boy's mother about possbily painting the skates black.  I get the feeling that money is an issue;  the boy's older sister also skates with us and is progressing quickly.  I suspect that if new skates are needed, Sis will get them and Brother will again get her old white ones.

We're only talking Basic Skills here so I don't want to pressure the mom to buy into stereotypes but OTOH I don't want the kid subjected to any form of teasing or ridicule from the occassionally loud-mouthed hockey kids either.  The boy loves to skates, likes spinning and is looking forward to learning the jumps he sees his sister trying. 

Should I say something (heck, I'd even offer to paint the skates myself!) or keep my mouth shut and hope for the best?


As a non-parent, non-coach might I suggest going to the mom and being very straight forward. "Timmy's doing very well and he's really enthusiastic. You know in the next session we'll be seeing an influx of hockey boys. It might be a good time to get Timmy some black boot covers to keep the teasing down. " If she's been around the rink (second child in the skates) she'll either nod wisely and say "Thanks," or say "Oh, we're not worried about that." 

Now everyone can jump on me.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: PrettySk8Dress on September 21, 2011, 08:54:24 PM
I'm not an instructor, but I do have extensive training in anti-bullying programs.

 I think telling a child that it is not kind to make fun of anyone, for any reason, and that I do not allow it to happen when I know about it is lecturing, and I will do that.  

 I will not tolerate any kind of belittling behavior.
 

Good for you, Schmeck. I am a volunteer instructor myself, and also have had some anti-bullying training myself.
 Bullying is not just for school anymore, bullying can occur at the ice rink, both on and off of the ice, at the mall, in a public park, at the movies, really anywhere these days. All you need is for a child to wear a different color of boots, or something similar, and have another older kid or adult say something like " As I see things, I'm really Right, I don't like what I am seeing, and so this has to stop Right Now ! ". Ones who care should step up to defuse and neutralize bullying whenever and wherever it happens, and not just look the other way.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: jjane45 on September 21, 2011, 11:10:50 PM
As a non-parent, non-coach might I suggest going to the mom and being very straight forward. "Timmy's doing very well and he's really enthusiastic. You know in the next session we'll be seeing an influx of hockey boys. It might be a good time to get Timmy some black boot covers to keep the teasing down. " If she's been around the rink (second child in the skates) she'll either nod wisely and say "Thanks," or say "Oh, we're not worried about that." 

Now everyone can jump on me.

I thought it's nicely phrased. But then I am never quite a MYOB person...
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: turnip on September 22, 2011, 02:24:33 PM
I've seen the odd little boy in hand-me-down white skates at my second rink, but never at my home rink. At rink2, they also have a variety of hire skaters, including black skates, so often see lts girls in black skates (or beige or blue or white!)

It isn't an issue. I notice it in the little boys, but think it's fab that they're so keen to skate they'll wear any skates they can.

The colour skates a kid wears doesn't matter. It does not make a difference to his or her future sexuality.

BUT some small minded people will always make life difficult for people who don't conform to what they think is right. And a six year old shouldn't have to put up with it for something so easy to change wth some cheap boot covers or tape. If an adult or teenager wants to make a statement thats great, but its kind of hard to explain to a little kid.

I would warn the parents that some kids and their parents may comment on their sons skates, suggest boot covers, but emphasise that it really doesn't matter that he has white boots. I wouldn't say anything to the kid himself though.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: blue111moon on September 23, 2011, 09:00:45 AM
I thank everyone for their comments.  Let me be clear though:  I have NO intention of saying anything to the child.  He's a happy kid who loves to skate and I honestly don't think he cares what color his skates are.  I'm also not concerned about the parents of the kids currently in the program saying anything mean or nasty to the either the child or to the parents.  This is the family's second year in the program (and the second year for the boy in his sister's skates;  I'm pretty sure the sister got new ones for this year and her old ones got handed down for the second time).

I am concerned about the influx of hockey players (and dads) we're expecting in a couple of weeks.  Kids in general aren't known for holding back and it wouldn't take much for one kid start something with a simple statement like "He's wearing GIRLS' skates!"  I know how to difuse and deflect if it does happen in my class.  I just don't want anything to happen in the lobby or the locker room that might diminish this child's enjoyment of skating.  And while the hockey dads that I've met from this program seem pretty nice, a couple of them did mention that there might be some "resistance" from their membership about the program being "run by figure skating women."  There is still a strong mentality around here that boys skate to play hockey.  Mind you, the hockey leagues are only too happy to accept girls who play hockey, because it expands their numbers, but it's still a male-dominated sport - and when you get that much testosterone in an enclosed space like a rink, sometimes the more civilized brain cells end up losing the battle for tolerance.  :)

I'm not sure what I'm going to do about this one boy.  As much as I'd hate to poke a stick into a hornet's nest by talking to the parents ahead of time,  I'd also hate to have said nothing should some situation arise that could have been prevented.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: isakswings on September 23, 2011, 08:45:21 PM
There's one boy in my LTS class <snip>
Should I say something (heck, I'd even offer to paint the skates myself!) or keep my mouth shut and hope for the best?

I have not read the other replies, so forgive me if this is a repeat. What about a pair of black boot covers? OR maybe a pair with a cool boy print on them??? Just a thought.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: isakswings on September 23, 2011, 08:56:05 PM

This is the correct answer to my earlier question, IMO, and I agree with you that the burden should not fall on children to already know to " conform " to other adult's predetermined, judgmental attitudes. It is the adults who need to readjust their possible prejudicial attitudes about the appearance of possible gender non-conformity.
I feel that the gender designation as determined by the color of a skater's boots is a valid one. However, there should be an attitude of tolerance and acceptance for those skaters who may be the exception to the boot color indicator of gender. Examples of this would be child skaters who wear a different color of boots than their birth gender due to financial constraints, or due to fit and growth issues. Also teen and adolescent skaters who are or may be transgender individuals and undergoing gender therapy and social readjustment should be allowed to wear the color of boots of their correct gender. Transgender skaters also should be allowed to wear the appropriate skating outfits and clothing of their correct gender, too.  None of these young skaters should be
" teased or ridiculed " by other skaters or adults because of their situation being viewed as supposedly non-conforming, IMO. Especially adult skaters and coaches should take the lead in making the rink or practice sessions a place of welcome and tolerance to all skaters, within reason, the color of their boots or their choice of their correct skating attire notwithstanding.  

When I was looking for my daughter's first pair of skates, I almost bought her a black pair thinking she would not care. She was 8 at the time and wanted nothing to do with black skates. She wanted white skates. I didn't make a big deal about the color of the skates, I just asked her what she thought about the skates and she said she wanted white skate. It really didn't matter to me. Skates were skates, but to her, she wanted white skates. I don't know if it was because her friend had white skates or if she really noticed that girls typically wear white and boys wear black. She ended up with white skates. :) Had we been given a pair of black skates, I would have had her use them... boot covers would have been a must, I am sure. LOL!
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: SynchKat on September 23, 2011, 11:18:05 PM
Kids can be mean.  Some adults are just big kids.  I taught at a club where coaches made fun of kids...I didn't last long there.

If you feel money is a problem you could maybe give them a roll of black skate tape and say "hey I was wondering how easy this stuff is to use and what a pair of skates fully taped would look like...wanna be my guinea pig?".  Kind of win win. 

And I'm pretty sure when my brother started skating my mom spray painted white skates black for him.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: blue111moon on September 26, 2011, 08:36:48 AM
I have not read the other replies, so forgive me if this is a repeat. What about a pair of black boot covers? OR maybe a pair with a cool boy print on them??? Just a thought.

The question is not what to do with the skates;  it's whether or not to approach the parents about doing something with the skates.

Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: fsk8r on September 26, 2011, 09:25:32 AM
The question is not what to do with the skates;  it's whether or not to approach the parents about doing something with the skates.



Given that you're worrying about it, then I think you should say something, but I'd add it in to a conversation you have with the parents about the boys progress. Best to sandwich it in, so you're praising his skating, express this concern, and then tell them how you think he's making wonderful progress. It lessens the message you're telling them but makes sure they're aware of the issue.

Incidentally I've seen quite a few black skates on ebay advertised as being ladies skates. I've yet to see white skates advertised as male. But I wonder if they're ladies skates because they're figure skates and not hockey skates?
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Skittl1321 on September 26, 2011, 09:53:41 AM
But I wonder if they're ladies skates because they're figure skates and not hockey skates?

Very likely.  My BIL went ice skating with me (because his 3 year old wanted to go) and I went behind the counter and got them both skates.  After we skated for about an hour he said to me "I've never tried figure skates before.  Those are a lot easier to balance in, but scary once you remember how to skate and start going fast, because of the toe pick." 

Then, I realized I had never asked him if he prefered hockey skates (oops, I bet he would have.  I would have insisted the 3-year old be in figure skates though).  But the counter guys always hand hockey skates to boys and figure skates to girls.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: kssk8fan on September 26, 2011, 09:37:42 PM
with this economy, if the kid's skates have decent blades and they fit, it shouldn't be a big deal at all!  In fact - I've seen kids with horrible skates (the one's you buy at sporting goods stores) and personally, the kids would skate better in rentals!  Color shouldn't matter....the fact that he's on the ice is good enough.  He'll eventually outgrow them and chances are, he'll get black ones next time.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: blue111moon on September 27, 2011, 08:48:08 AM
I know color SHOULDN"T be a big deal, and to me, it isn't.  I don't care what color the kid's skates are as long as he's having fun and progressing, which he is.  This is his second year in the program - and his second pair of the white skates.  He's wearing the ones his sister out-grew last year; she got the new ones.  I don't know if it's a question of money for the parents.  They seem like nice people but they don't hang around the rink much before or after the lessons so my contact with them is limited, since I'm on the ice teaching.  I don't know if they have a gender-neutral parenting philosophy. 

I do however have some experience with young hockey players - and their parents - and generally, tact is not a part of their make-up.  :)  It could only take one smart-mouth comment at the wrong moment to destroy this boy's enjoyment of an activity that he he happens to be pretty good at.

But who knows?  The kids could also just blow the comment off and go merrily on his way, white skates and all.  Maybe over the summer, the little hockey players - and their parents - have all learned tact, discretion and tolerance and no one will say anything at all.  I truly hope I've been worrying for nothing.

Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: FigureSpins on October 19, 2011, 09:07:29 AM
Didn't Michael Weiss start in white skates, handed down from his sister?
According to Audrey Weisiger, his coach, the answer is "yes."  They called them "speckled skates."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCPfiWVNNMY&sns=fb

The video shows coaches from Ft. Dumont's LTS program displaying used skates donated by Rachael Flatt for the free program.
Title: Re: Question for Parents - LTS Boy in white skates
Post by: Query on October 19, 2011, 02:51:59 PM
Cover the skates with sparkles. No one will see the underlying color.

Are there sparkly boot covers?